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INTL v5.0 > Discussion Forums > The "Song A Day" Thread Forum > The Lord of the Rings part 2: The Two Towers; My scathing and cynical review. > Viewing Thread
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Baggy_Brad
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(Originally posted on: 02-16-03 06:54:40 AM)
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I saw this movie called "The Two Towers". It was crap. Review.
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Reply 1 of 28 (Originally posted on: 02-16-03 07:25:29 AM)
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This is because before this movie, any other thing I’d seen that involved a ring that gave the wearer powers was Captain Planet and I couldn’t see anyone in this movie that was actively polluting.


+ Karma!

An excellent review indeed, Bradley. My commendations to yourself!
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Reply 2 of 28 (Originally posted on: 02-16-03 10:06:14 AM)
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I thought it was a good movie.

Your mind is to much focused on homosexuality.
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Reply 3 of 28 (Originally posted on: 02-16-03 10:18:49 AM)
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Surely, it was a good movie, but it barely met the potential it had to be an excellent movie.
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Reply 4 of 28 (Originally posted on: 02-16-03 12:19:59 PM)
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I think maybe if he stopped using the words "faggot" and "gay" so often, it'd be a decent review.

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Reply 5 of 28 (Originally posted on: 02-16-03 12:25:53 PM)
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but first, who wants to give me a spounge bath?

i'm filthy!
fuck off
This reply was last edited on 02-16-03 01:47:41 PM by drahnier.
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Reply 6 of 28 (Originally posted on: 02-16-03 12:37:04 PM)
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The whole "Sam and Frodo are gay and there are gay innuendos and it's gay lol" thing has been done in like four other reviews I read, so it lacks originality.

The only funny thing was the joke about Cowan's whore girlfriend.
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Reply 7 of 28 (Originally posted on: 02-16-03 12:53:15 PM)
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I thought the Gaia, the Spirit of the Earth bit was pretty funny
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Reply 8 of 28 (Originally posted on: 02-16-03 01:56:45 PM)
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It was decent compared to the new star wars movies, imo.
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Reply 9 of 28 (Originally posted on: 02-16-03 01:58:57 PM)
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The only funny thing was the joke about Cowan's whore girlfriend.


You have to admit the Captain Planet lines were hilarity, my sir.
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Reply 10 of 28 (Originally posted on: 02-16-03 03:10:17 PM)
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Good article, Brad.

It was enjoyable.
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im gay

Reply 11 of 28 (Originally posted on: 02-16-03 04:11:41 PM)
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I second Izzy's sentiment, and add a little bit of my own. For a supposedly witty review, it is filled with more low-brow humour than the movie it is supposed to be criticising. Actually, the review is filled with a level of crap exponentially higher than the movie it attacks.

I'm not so much defending the movie, as I am insulting whatever notion brought forth the idea that "faggot" and "gay" are still witty insults, or that those who use them as such are still respected in any way, shape, or form.

Perhaps if the review actually REVIEWED the movie, rather than just pointing out one or two "innuendos" and spending the whole time talking about them, I'd actually like it; but it didn't, and I don't.

If this review actually WAS written by you Brad, then clearly you've been lying your ass off and fooling us all into believing you are a much smarter, wittier, and better person than the review suggests you are.

Any way you spell it, this piece of trash sucks.

And that's MY scathing and cynical review. Except that I wrote it in about 2 minutes, and it still retains more content about the actual movie than your review.
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Reply 12 of 28 (Originally posted on: 02-16-03 04:26:17 PM)
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The gay thing was not up to Bradley's par, but seriously, how can you not commend the Captain Planet comment? The connatation is witty and full of charm.
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Reply 13 of 28 (Originally posted on: 02-17-03 02:09:30 AM)
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The gay thing was not up to Bradley's par, but seriously, how can you not commend the Captain Planet comment? The connatation is witty and full of charm.

For real. Brad is probably the funniest Australian ever.
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Reply 14 of 28 (Originally posted on: 02-17-03 03:01:09 AM)
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Perhaps if the review actually REVIEWED the movie, rather than just pointing out one or two "innuendos" and spending the whole time talking about them, I'd actually like it; but it didn't, and I don't.


Did you SEE this movie? Seriously, you might have accidently gone to a better movie like "Spy Kids 2: The Island of Lost Dreams" and just gotten confused. Had I actually watched the movie the whole way through and survived without choking myself with my belt, chances are I would have been mentally dulled so deeply that I would have written a crap review about it. Faggot.
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Reply 15 of 28 (Originally posted on: 02-17-03 03:31:17 AM)
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Quoted from Stormraider:
I'm not so much defending the movie, as I am insulting whatever notion brought forth the idea that "faggot" and "gay" are still witty insults, or that those who use them as such are still respected in any way, shape, or form.


Actually, I think that Brad was saying that stuff to make fun of the people who actually think that they're witty insults. It's satire.
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Reply 16 of 28 (Originally posted on: 02-17-03 08:14:07 AM)
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There is no deeper meaning to the words Brad uses. His review sucked, and he basically reviews all movies this way. Long story short, Brad, don't become a critic. On a side note, Captain Planet/Cowan comments are common place when Brad's around.
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Reply 17 of 28 (Originally posted on: 02-17-03 01:35:06 PM)
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Then, near the end there was some huge budget battle which I think they ripped off from this cool Lego man war I used to do back when I was like 10
Haha, that was my favorite part. +1 big grin
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Reply 18 of 28 (Originally posted on: 02-17-03 05:23:13 PM)
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the review's a bit light-weighted in its complexity, but i do agree with you: Lord of the Rings was little more than a B+ movie. I couldn't stand Sam and i didn't get the whole Angela Lansbury/Columbo thing by the pile of smoking corpses. The book's just too damn long and boring to be made into a good movie.
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Reply 19 of 28 (Originally posted on: 02-17-03 07:41:31 PM)
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Infidel.
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Reply 20 of 28 (Originally posted on: 02-17-03 09:35:07 PM)
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Wow, how...pedestrian.
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Reply 21 of 28 (Originally posted on: 02-17-03 10:46:11 PM)
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I guess when I saw this movie I was concentrating on my date more than the screen, but still, I found it to be very confusing. People told me I should have read the book, but then again, it's a looooong book.
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The book's just too damn long and boring to be made into a good movie.
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Reply 22 of 28 (Originally posted on: 02-18-03 01:05:19 AM)
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I thought it was an extremely well done middle movie, if it werent for gollum it would have tanked though. Gollum saved the film much like he saved the book....yep, I read. Still it is the middle of one story, so it's basically the body of the story, lacking an introduction and a conclusion will probably make the worse of the three films. I can only hope they dont take as many liberties as they did with this one in the next, most important film, because this is last movie is their big chance to make the entire series worthy of the crapper.
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Reply 23 of 28 (Originally posted on: 02-20-03 12:51:38 AM)
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i can't believe people are taking this review....seriously.
...and i don't even care anyfuckingmore.
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Reply 24 of 28 (Originally posted on: 02-20-03 01:47:55 AM)
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I wasn't taking it seriously but some people were being serious about the film so I was kind of going along with them instead of the origional post.....it was funny but I liked the 50 reasons LOTR sucked list better.

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