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What Will Mr. Sweeney Say?
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A. 1 vote, 4.348%
B. 22 votes, 95.652%
Totals: 23 votes, 103.058%
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Air Bud
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(Originally posted on: 12-30-02 03:33:50 AM)
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Okay. I'm going to try something a bit different here. I got this idea from a gimmick at the Something Awful Forums, so I'm going to try it here and see how well it goes. Basically, every day or so, I'll continue the story, based on the path you choose in the previous chapter. Every chapter will be a poll with various options that will shape the next chapter. Kind of like the books you might have read when you were in elementary school. Anyway, so here it is. I can't guarantee this will be absolutely fucking hilarious, nor can I guarantee whether I'll even continue this past the first few chapters, but it's something new and I figured it might be worth a try. At any point, if you would like to continue the story, just let me know. I don't claim exclusive rights to this idea, so I'm open to you guys continuing the story, if I suddenly become inactive or unfunny throughout this storyline.



Much to James astonishment, someone was knocking on his door. "No one ever visits me," thought James to himself. He peeled himself out of his filthy barcalounger and made his way to the door. Upon his body, he wore an equally filthy, food-stained wifebeater and ratty lime-green sweatpants. When he reached the door, he looked through the peephole, only to see his landlord standing there with a scowling look on his face.

James recoiled in terror as he saw the balding man at his door. He realized that it was the 7th of July and his rent was a week overdue yet again. Not that he could've paid it anyway, after all, he didn't even have a job.

"I know you're in there," yelled the landlord as he continued to knock on James' door. "This is the final straw, James. You've been late on your rent for the last time. Consider this your eviction." As James heard the word "eviction" his stomach turned. "You have two days to get your ass out of here."

James rushed to the door and hastily opened it in an attempt to bargain with his landlord. As the door swung open, his landlord turned to face James. "No! You can't evict me, Mr. Sweeney! I have nowhere to go!"

Mr. Sweeney's face changed suddenly, it was a look that James couldn't read. The old, balding man stroked his straggly beard with his left hand, and then began to speak...

A. "Too bad. Sounds like a personal problem to me, I want you out of here."

B. "You have until tomorrow to get me my money."
This reply was last edited on 12-30-02 03:40:14 AM by Air Bud.
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Reply 1 of 11 (Originally posted on: 12-30-02 03:36:09 AM)
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Badass.
Simpleton


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Reply 2 of 11 (Originally posted on: 12-30-02 03:39:19 AM)
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heh....this is good stuff! *loved those choose your own adventure books*
You still reading this trash? Go eat a donut...

I crossed the street to what I call my "company car." It's a dark green 1979 Volare. The Vobeast. It looks like shit, sounds like shit, drives like shit, and generally fits in well in most of places where I have to work.- Dennis Lehane(A Drink Before the War)
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Reply 3 of 11 (Originally posted on: 12-30-02 03:47:42 AM)
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Quoted from Sandamnit:
He realized that it was the 7th of July and his rent was a week overdue yet again.


1. thank you for freaking me out and making me wonder if i payed my cell phone bill or not. (i did, bastard)

2. what a freakin good idea. i chose b.
omg, i'm so lolol.
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Reply 4 of 11 (Originally posted on: 12-30-02 04:08:11 AM)
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B means he will have to find some hilarious way to come up with the money.

A could mean he will flip out and murder his landlord, and have to try to get away with the crime.

I chose B.
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Reply 5 of 11 (Originally posted on: 12-30-02 05:12:01 AM)
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I concur, viva la B.
"I refuse to use the flamethrower on the grounds I may incinerate myself" - Roatigas.
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Reply 6 of 11 (Originally posted on: 12-30-02 05:23:40 AM)
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Im so indecisive *sad*
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Cool.

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Reply 7 of 11 (Originally posted on: 12-30-02 05:51:48 AM)
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Quote:
Kind of like the books you might have read when you were in elementary school.


Dude, I'm in the middle of one of those right now.
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Air Bud
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Reply 8 of 11 (Originally posted on: 12-30-02 06:28:02 AM)
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Quoted from Baggy_Brad:
Dude, I'm in the middle of one of those right now.
You're still in elementary school?
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Reply 9 of 11 (Originally posted on: 12-30-02 06:40:35 AM)
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I'm at an elementary school, if you know what I mean.
[I'm a Bloody Aussie!
[Humanity is Hilarious.
[As far as I'm concerned, the Internet is just another way to get rejected by a woman.

My Jokes would seem a lot funnier if you'd had the same childhood as me... The Hackey Central Times
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Reply 10 of 11 (Originally posted on: 12-30-02 06:45:12 AM)
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The education system is different in Australia. What we call "Elementary School" they call "The Australian Education System." While we advance to higher learning every few years, most Australian kids are stuck learning the same retarded shit over and over again because Australia is a poor, horrible country. Ever wonder why Crocodile Dundee was so amazed by all the shit in New York? No, not because he lived in the outback, he lived in Sydney, it's because he's just a fucking dumbass. And don't let them tell you that Mel Gibson is smart and Australian. Mel Gibson isn't Australian. I don't know where he's from, but he's not Australian. He moved to Australia and became their intelligent mascot to cover up how stupid the population of Australia is. I mean, would we let them fight wars with us if we knew the average Australian soldier had to carry multiplication tables with them just so they could estimate how much food they would need for a certain number of troops? God forbid they try to calculate how many enemy troops there are or how many missles they need to blow up a tank.
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Reply 11 of 11 (Originally posted on: 12-30-02 11:05:05 PM)
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Whoever voted A should be shunned. Repeatedly.
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