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mmac
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(Originally posted on: 10-25-10 10:48:34 PM)
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On September 15 I moved into a new apartment with one of my girlfriends friends (we'll call her Sarah) and a high school friend (we'll call him Steve).

Steve has a girlfriend who is fucking nuts (her name really is Kendra). She freaks out on a regular basis over minuscule issues and ends up becoming verbally and physically abusive towards Steve.

The first incident involved an argument over Steve's non desire to sleep with Kendra for a second time in and afternoon 15 minutes before work, and after he had already taken a shower. Kendra berates Steve loud enough that me and Sarah can hear the conversation saying how he isn't a man, how he's pathetic etc, etc. They broke up.

At the end of Steve's shift they were back together.

Me and Sarah regularly notice small little arguments, occasionally hearing Kendra scream at Steve. Steve doesn't yell back, he calmly states his position and asks Kendra to quit screaming; this makes Kendra yell louder.

Since that time Kendra has woken me and Sarah up twice by screaming between 2:00 and 3:00 on evenings when she hadn't been drinking. During those conversations we hear things like "you're such a selfish little bitch it's pathetic" and "you're a little selfish ass kisser, you're fucked up and don't even know it".

Later I found out that one of these incidents was because Steve was picking up Kendra and Kendra saw a spider on the dashboard. She starts screaming hysterically for Steve to kill the spider. They were traveling down a main roadway through town with six lanes at ~45mph. Steve tries to pull off the road at the nearest intersection where it is legal to park, but Kendra jumps out of the moving car. It was a FUCKING dime sized spider on the dashboard.

After this they broke up again for less than 12 hours.

Skip ahead to Sunday

I'm making pancakes for my girlfriend (pumpkin spice pancakes w/ bison sausage bitches!) and hear Kendra screaming from her car. Steve tries to walk inside but Kendra starts pulling on his arm. When Steve is halfway through the door he sweeps down his arm, pulling Kendra off his arm and she falls down two stairs off the entryway. Steve turns to go into the door and Kendra grabs him around the waist screaming things like "don't go, please don't go" with Steve yelling "Leave me alone, get out of here". Steve again pulls Kendra off his waist and comes inside, immediately locking the door behind him. Kendra then took out our hidden key and threw it and the pot it was hidden under at Steve, then walks up to Steve and starts punching him. After this I grabbed Kendra and walked her out the door. Me and my girlfriend were in the kitchen and able to witness the entire incident.

An hour later her mom calls, threatening Steve "You had better call me right away or you and your roommate will be talking to the police!"

This fucking bitch is crazy!

I then make Steve a bloody mary and and we start talking. Steve was insistent that the relationship was over, and I clarified that I didn't want her over anymore. The two of them have been dating 1.5 years, and it turns out that Kendra has "only been crazy for the last 9 months, but the past month has been really bad". I related stories of problematic relationships that I had been in, and he responded by saying he understood how unhealthy they were. Turns out Kendra breaks up with Steve during almost every argument they have, but ends up bawling and they usually get back together within 12 hours... But this time was final.

At 7PM, approximately 30 hours after they broke up, Steve went back over there saying that "I'm going to give her one more week to get her act together, and that's it."

I'm torn on what I should do about this. It is affecting both me and my other roommate, and I feel my friend is being verbally and physically abused by this bitch on a regular basis. We're not the closest friends, but we do have a friendship that goes back several years. Should I do something? What should I do?

TLDR;

Crazy bitch screams at my friend and hits him. He takes it like a bitch.
WTF should I do about this C@#$^nt?!?!
Mingan
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Reply 1 of 32 (Originally posted on: 10-26-10 06:37:06 AM)
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wait till he gets it. all you can do.

or kill her.
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Reply 2 of 32 (Originally posted on: 10-26-10 07:46:12 AM)
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Yeah there's not really a lot you can do about this I don't think. It will probably just fuck up your relationship with your roommate, he seems to be dependent on her for something.
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Reply 3 of 32 (Originally posted on: 10-26-10 07:46:44 AM)
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She must be really, really hot for him to put up with that much crazy.
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mmac
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Reply 4 of 32 (Originally posted on: 10-26-10 08:02:44 AM)
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Quoted from Mingan:
wait till he gets it. all you can do.

or kill her.


I have been watching a lot of Dexter lately...
mmac
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Reply 5 of 32 (Originally posted on: 10-26-10 08:07:47 AM)
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Quoted from Beta Wolf:
She must be really, really hot for him to put up with that much crazy.


Not really, she's overprocessed. She might be moderately attractive if she wore 1/3 of the makeup. She thinks she's hot, and always talks about going to minneapolis to model -.-

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Reply 6 of 32 (Originally posted on: 10-26-10 10:31:37 AM)
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Reply 7 of 32 (Originally posted on: 10-26-10 11:40:57 AM)
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Kendra is awesome. You should keep your distance and laugh your ass off.
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Reply 8 of 32 (Originally posted on: 10-26-10 12:10:24 PM)
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Yeah don't let her in your house but laugh from a distance. I think that's the best option here.
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Reply 9 of 32 (Originally posted on: 10-26-10 12:24:24 PM)
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Quoted from Jack London:
Yeah don't let her in your house but laugh from a distance. I think that's the best option here.

Does he really have an option not to let her in though? Like, if Steve isn't there, obviously he doesn't have to (and shouldn't) let her in the apartment. but if Steve is there, not allowing Kendra in could make things a lot worse both for Steve and for mmac's friendship with Steve. Which leads to a strained environment in the house & possible discomfort for Sarah (or worse, a three person battle).

Mike, if you and Sarah agree that her presence in the apartment is disruptive (and it sure sounds like it!) & it's causing unignorable problems, sit down with Steve and discuss it among the three of you. Try to come to some sort of agreement about when she is and is not allowed in the apt, noise levels, etc. and, if possible, check rules for your apartment building/complex about noise levels. If the walls are thin, her yelling at 3am could be disturbing the neighbours, too. Once you've figured out what's okay, all three of you should it down with Kendra and explain what's happening. Strength in numbers and all that.

It's up to Steve how he fucks up his life, and you've explained how you felt about his relationship, so you really can do much more at this point unless you can get a retraining order against her. Which would be hilarious.
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Reply 10 of 32 (Originally posted on: 10-26-10 01:24:05 PM)
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Quote:
Does he really have an option not to let her in though?


Hell yeah he does. He lives there too doesn't he? I agree that they need to talk but the moment someone threatens to have me arrested is the moment they no longer get to invade my living space. I think that's reasonable.
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Reply 11 of 32 (Originally posted on: 10-26-10 04:25:51 PM)
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Quote:
Try to come to some sort of agreement about when she is and is not allowed in the apt, noise levels, etc. and, if possible, check rules for your apartment building/complex about noise levels. If the walls are thin, her yelling at 3am could be disturbing the neighbours, too.


just so everyone's clear, this is an absurd & unworkable idea


you really have two options. 1) do nothing 2) ask your roommate to move out, making sure he knows as well as you can (won't be easy) that it's about his girlfriend and not him
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Reply 12 of 32 (Originally posted on: 10-26-10 05:06:35 PM)
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Again, Ice is correct.

Doing nothing obviously isn't working for you so do something. Ask your roommate to move out and just reinforce that you aren't mad at him. Ask him if he wants to hang out sans that crazy bitch.
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Reply 13 of 32 (Originally posted on: 10-27-10 12:20:02 AM)
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My brother was in a similar situation. We all told him his girlfriend was nuts, unbalanced, crazy, selfish, dangerous, etc. The only thing that worked was when he finally came to the conclusion himself.
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Reply 14 of 32 (Originally posted on: 10-28-10 09:37:43 AM)
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Tell your room mate to get some balls. My last ex tried to punch me because of a non-threatening verbal argument. I just grabbed her by her wrists and lightly tossed her back. How could women be so dumb as to physically attack someone stronger than them that they supposedly love? This was when I knew things were fucked.

Or you could do some sort of devious meddling and manipulating and turn into a tragic comedy, that'd be funny too.
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mmac
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Reply 15 of 32 (Originally posted on: 11-01-10 10:24:15 PM)
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1.Tonight Kendra told Steve that she quit taking birth control.
2.Steve pulled out
3.Kendra proceeds to bitch at Steve for almost an hour because by pulling out, Kendra was unable to cum.

After an hour of hearing partial conversations over my computer I hear Kendra yell" I hate you, I hate you, I hate you"

I responded with "Then get the fuck out of my house!"

They Left

My roommate called to ask me if I would be willing to apologize.
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Reply 16 of 32 (Originally posted on: 11-02-10 12:35:38 AM)
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your roommate is going down a very dark path
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Reply 17 of 32 (Originally posted on: 11-02-10 06:26:26 AM)
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Does he want you to apologize because Kendra commands it, or is he actually pissed off at you?
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mmac
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Reply 18 of 32 (Originally posted on: 11-02-10 08:36:08 AM)
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Because Kendra commands it.

I told him that "I feel she was being verbally abusive to my friend (him) as well as disrespecting me and Sarah by keeping us awake arguing after midnight.

I don't feel that I did anything wrong because this is unproductive and a regular occurrence. If you would like me to explain my feelings to her in a calm manner I would be more than willing to."
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Reply 19 of 32 (Originally posted on: 11-02-10 09:21:37 AM)
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Quote:
My roommate called to ask me if I would be willing to apologize.


What?
"you look bigger on facebook"
-Amphy
mmac
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Reply 20 of 32 (Originally posted on: 11-02-10 11:13:27 AM)
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Quoted from Dag Hammarskjöld:
Quote:
My roommate called to ask me if I would be willing to apologize.


What?
Exactly
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Reply 21 of 32 (Originally posted on: 11-02-10 03:20:06 PM)
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This just gets worse and worse.
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Reply 22 of 32 (Originally posted on: 11-02-10 04:23:59 PM)
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I'm starting to lean more towards the kill her option, you know, before she kills your friend
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Ztolk
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Reply 23 of 32 (Originally posted on: 11-02-10 04:27:35 PM)
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How does Sarah feel about all this?
"you look bigger on facebook"
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mmac
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Reply 24 of 32 (Originally posted on: 11-02-10 05:37:24 PM)
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Sarah thinks it's unfair that she is woken up between 12:00 and 12:30 once a week on average. I agree with her.
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