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flaming arrow
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old time judge suck cock

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(Originally posted on: 09-17-08 12:21:09 PM)
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For me it was yesterday! While I was at work!

There I was, cleaning the frosty machine, when I felt the need to fart. Now I'd had diarrhea all day but I'd taken care of it earlier and plus I took some Pepto so I should've been fine. Nope, instead of farting I shit my pants. Really fun explaining to my manager why I had to go home.
Me: Well I'm done here, time to go home.
Manager: No you're not, you still have to restock [blah blah].
Me: Yeah, that's not gonna happen.
Manager: And why not?
Me: Kinda just shit my pants.
Manager: ...
Coworker: It does smell really bad in here all of a sudden..
Manager: Go home.

It's been like five years since I done that. Five long years of no pants-shitting down the drain. Plus I still have diarrhea. Really bad. Like 98% liquid. Plus the Pepto made it black which kinda freaked me out at first.
I'm the conjurer of demons,
I'm the father of your death.
I bring forth the ancient evil,
I control his every breath.
I instigate your misfortune,
With the birth of killing trolls.
I awaken armageddon,
Feeding on a thousand souls.
emtilt

the cow of horses

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Reply 1 of 42 (Originally posted on: 09-17-08 12:35:43 PM)
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ummm never
this is my music i hope you like it
this is music i listen to these are movies i like these are books i like
flaming arrow
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old time judge suck cock

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Reply 2 of 42 (Originally posted on: 09-17-08 12:37:39 PM)
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Quoted from emtilt:
ummm never


fucking liar
I'm the conjurer of demons,
I'm the father of your death.
I bring forth the ancient evil,
I control his every breath.
I instigate your misfortune,
With the birth of killing trolls.
I awaken armageddon,
Feeding on a thousand souls.
ba
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Captain of the Cool Kids

and i said, a\re you a gay ass fucker who can't take a baseball up the ass you faggot???? and he said yes........

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Reply 3 of 42 (Originally posted on: 09-17-08 12:55:05 PM)
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I can only remember doing it once when I was like 9. I was out playing in the woods like a half mile from my house near this lake, and I farted (hilariously). It ended up not being fart at all.

So I sprinted the entire half mile back to my house in a frenzied panic and took a shower.

man I miss childhood
~British Agent
.___.
{O,o} O RLY?
/)__)
-"-"-
"So it goes." - KV
ba
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Captain of the Cool Kids

and i said, a\re you a gay ass fucker who can't take a baseball up the ass you faggot???? and he said yes........

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Reply 4 of 42 (Originally posted on: 09-17-08 12:56:06 PM)
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and no I don't own that underwear anymore
~British Agent
.___.
{O,o} O RLY?
/)__)
-"-"-
"So it goes." - KV
flaming arrow
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old time judge suck cock

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Reply 5 of 42 (Originally posted on: 09-17-08 12:59:40 PM)
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Quoted from British Agent:
and no I don't own that underwear anymore


I seriously doubt anyone would expect you to own underwear you had when you were 9.

What are you like 17? That'd be retarded.
I'm the conjurer of demons,
I'm the father of your death.
I bring forth the ancient evil,
I control his every breath.
I instigate your misfortune,
With the birth of killing trolls.
I awaken armageddon,
Feeding on a thousand souls.
ba
INTL Premium Member
Captain of the Cool Kids

and i said, a\re you a gay ass fucker who can't take a baseball up the ass you faggot???? and he said yes........

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Reply 6 of 42 (Originally posted on: 09-17-08 01:09:06 PM)
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I'm 16, that was only 7 years ago.
~British Agent
.___.
{O,o} O RLY?
/)__)
-"-"-
"So it goes." - KV
ba
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Captain of the Cool Kids

and i said, a\re you a gay ass fucker who can't take a baseball up the ass you faggot???? and he said yes........

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Reply 7 of 42 (Originally posted on: 09-17-08 01:58:55 PM)
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oh and we all know you kept yours, I was just making sure I wasn't lumped in with you.
~British Agent
.___.
{O,o} O RLY?
/)__)
-"-"-
"So it goes." - KV
Pertti Susilainen
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mr. sukkit

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Reply 8 of 42 (Originally posted on: 09-17-08 02:01:52 PM)
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I'm kinda freaked out at the moment.
đonne onwŠcne­ eft wineleas guma, gesih­ him biforan fealwe wegas, ba■ian brimfuglas, brŠdan fe■ra, hreosan hrim ond snaw hagle gemenged. Ůonne beo­ ■y hefigran heortan benne, sare Šfter swŠsne. Sorg bi­ geniwad ■onne maga gemynd mod geondhweorfe­, grete­ gliwstafum, georne geondsceawa­ secga geseldan; swimma­ oft on weg. Fleotendra fer­ no ■Šr fela bringe­ cu­ra cwidegiedda.
The Wanderer, l. 45-55a
Guy Tuttle and Ass
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gotta get that VICTORY ROYALE #gamer #memes #LoL

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Reply 9 of 42 (Originally posted on: 09-17-08 02:14:48 PM)
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lollin irl
D
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i didn't have the strength to get it all the way off

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Reply 10 of 42 (Originally posted on: 09-17-08 02:22:22 PM)
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I think the fact that you were impressed with your 5-year streak of fecal-free undies is funnier then the fact that a twenty-something shit his pants.

Either way, good stuff.
drahnier
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Reply 11 of 42 (Originally posted on: 09-17-08 02:47:13 PM)
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When you're on a diet of beer and McDonalds, you're bound to shit your pants at some point.
DRAHNIER
ba
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Captain of the Cool Kids

and i said, a\re you a gay ass fucker who can't take a baseball up the ass you faggot???? and he said yes........

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Reply 12 of 42 (Originally posted on: 09-17-08 02:48:44 PM)
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sounds like you have a story to share
~British Agent
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{O,o} O RLY?
/)__)
-"-"-
"So it goes." - KV
Pertti Susilainen
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mr. sukkit

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Reply 13 of 42 (Originally posted on: 09-17-08 02:50:31 PM)
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But please don't.
đonne onwŠcne­ eft wineleas guma, gesih­ him biforan fealwe wegas, ba■ian brimfuglas, brŠdan fe■ra, hreosan hrim ond snaw hagle gemenged. Ůonne beo­ ■y hefigran heortan benne, sare Šfter swŠsne. Sorg bi­ geniwad ■onne maga gemynd mod geondhweorfe­, grete­ gliwstafum, georne geondsceawa­ secga geseldan; swimma­ oft on weg. Fleotendra fer­ no ■Šr fela bringe­ cu­ra cwidegiedda.
The Wanderer, l. 45-55a
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get in the box
People are a danger to society.

there is a guy who gets it on with three girls at once and they all have amazing unibrows

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Reply 14 of 42 (Originally posted on: 09-17-08 03:21:46 PM)
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Running home from elementary school in the middle of winter when I was eight or so. That was bogus. I was about halfway home when I suddenly realized that the situation went from normal to emergency.

Even if I had made it home on time, it would have been trouble with a full-bodied snow suit on.
how is this for a quote
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Reply 15 of 42 (Originally posted on: 09-17-08 03:46:34 PM)
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Well over ten years.

Also, 7 year old underpants, really?

I think the oldest I have might be a year old.
őjust dandyŤ but. again. funnel aspect. I don't want anything put in there unawares. I'm no Richard Gere.
őPurpleŤ If it was Sunny doing it, s/he'd be pretty rough
őjust dandyŤ ouch. I just involuntarily clenched.
Nickolati
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...moved to Idaho?

the cumstain that is left on the wall 11 years after the party has ended

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Reply 16 of 42 (Originally posted on: 09-17-08 04:32:01 PM)
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Yeah dude. I don't wear socks more than three or four times. I throw underwear away regularly.
ôYou know the world is going crazy when the best rapper is a white guy, the best golfer is a black guy, the tallest guy in the NBA is Chinese, the Swiss hold the America's Cup, France is accusing the U.S. of arrogance, Germany doesn't want to go to war, and the three most powerful men in America are named 'Bush', 'Dick', and 'Colon.' Need I say more?ö - Chris Rock
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Reply 17 of 42 (Originally posted on: 09-17-08 05:18:33 PM)
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that's incredibly wasteful you're a bad person
Nickolati
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...moved to Idaho?

the cumstain that is left on the wall 11 years after the party has ended

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Reply 18 of 42 (Originally posted on: 09-17-08 05:23:40 PM)
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Quoted from ice:
that's incredibly wasteful you're a bad person


So fresh and so clean, clean.
ôYou know the world is going crazy when the best rapper is a white guy, the best golfer is a black guy, the tallest guy in the NBA is Chinese, the Swiss hold the America's Cup, France is accusing the U.S. of arrogance, Germany doesn't want to go to war, and the three most powerful men in America are named 'Bush', 'Dick', and 'Colon.' Need I say more?ö - Chris Rock
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Reply 19 of 42 (Originally posted on: 09-17-08 05:25:44 PM)
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I was once at a bush party, and I had to squat and pee. Well, in the process of just about pulling down my pants, I... uh... peed, and then did the number two.

Lesson learned, everyone was way too drunk and I proceeded to walk home with already hammered friends who had no idea that had happened.
Ztolk
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Rawr.

definitely threw the blue lego

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Reply 20 of 42 (Originally posted on: 09-17-08 05:33:48 PM)
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About 17 years.
"I used the internet to get laid once. That is not a shining moment of pride for me. The worst thing? She evidently gave me chlamydia, which I evidently got cleared up."
-Wandering Idiot
Amphytrite
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I don't really even like hearing about it or reading about it

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Reply 21 of 42 (Originally posted on: 09-17-08 05:38:16 PM)
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Quoted from emtilt:
ummm never

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Reply 22 of 42 (Originally posted on: 09-17-08 05:59:43 PM)
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I was born potty trained!
Amphytrite
Hard for Drah

I don't really even like hearing about it or reading about it

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Reply 23 of 42 (Originally posted on: 09-17-08 06:27:28 PM)
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omg me too!
Spiff: amphytrite, the anti-tart
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Reply 24 of 42 (Originally posted on: 09-17-08 06:51:09 PM)
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looks like flaming arrow is hungry again.

enough of that
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