Wandering Idiot
INTL Premium Member
 Surely something dumber has come up since my apparent forgetfulness for STDs and doctor visits.
Ballkicks: (+257 / -16)
Posts: 2130 (0.333)
Reg. Date: Jul 2003
Location: Arms' reach of my wifes' bitchslap
Gender: Male |
Reply 4 of 78 (Originally posted on: 03-15-06 09:48:45 PM)
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You could always develop some kind of problem that limits your ability to perform your duties and get a medical discharge. That would be somewhat similar to my situation, except that I actually have 3 torn and protruding discs in my lower back, and my unit is being indecisive about sending me to a medical holding company so I can get around to going to a med board.
You could always go to work stoned and say "Hey, I'm stoned" to your section sergeant. It didn't work for me (I told my NCO while we were out walking for remedial PT).
Develop something related to PTSD or just go about horribly depressed for a few months, and voluntarily admit yourself to a few visitations with Adult Behavioral Health. That didn't work for me either, they just told me I was a drunk and sent me off to ASAP/ADAPC/DARE. When I got sent back to behavioral health they determined that I was mentally fit to turn a wrench, but not to shoot at anything, so I'm non-deployable for that reason alone.
File for a Consiencious Objector discharge. Bonus points for PTSD if you ever had to fire upon the enemy. This will add to the sympathetical perspective from command, making them think you can't handle combat stress. It'd pay to have a good depression bit worked in there as well, and sleeping troubles.
I've been trying to get out of the army ever since I got into it. They will NOT let you out in an easy fashion. I've failed every PT test I took in Korea, then a stop-loss came down for PT failures. I passed one here at Campbell only to get my promotion. I've failed tape tests for about ten months now, that hasn't gotten me out either. You're not in the proper shape to fail tape tests anyhow, nor would I suggest trying to obtain the condition.
Honestly, your best way out would be consciencious objection. You could always take up some form of non-violent religion (buddhism), but that would mean you would actually have to start building a reputation as that type of religious person, so there would be ample proof that you actually are what you say you are.
Best of luck finding a loophole to get out, but depending on what amount of time you have on your contract, I think you might be screwed. Keep in mind that if you have a letter of acceptance from a college, you can be released 90 days early with commander's approval and a 4187. If you already have a class schedule drawn up, on top of the acceptance letter, and as much proof as possible, you can look into getting a 6 month early drop, but that has to be approved by at least your batallion commander, if not Brigade.
Kayte, the Army isn't putting out as many homos these days as they used to. There was a story a while back in the Army Times about how the army is loosening regulations in the "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" policy to allow patriotic homosexuals to serve in the armed forces. I don't know what happened with that supposed Regs change, but I think they're willing to keep a flamer these days, considering that initial enlistments are falling short of their goals on a monthly basis.
What are people thinking when they come in the military? Well, I'll tell you what I was thinking. I got no job, money, a shitty truck and live with a bunch of fucks that are going nowhere in life. I think I'll join the army! After Basic and AIT, I thought I could handle dealing with my remaining 3.5 years of service. Then I got to Korea, met some great people, but mostly just a bunch of social rejects and derelicts that like to abuse their power when put into a leadership position. When I got to Fort Campbell, I realized that my command is full of incompetent racist fucksticks (seriously, not one white person in my chain of command above squad leaders) that like to hand out Bronze Stars to all their buddies and put themselves in for them as well, but neglect the soldiers that actually work their asses off and keep the unit running. Maybe I'm just bitter because my first sergeant (a fucking E-7) spent the year in Iraq talking up the people in the PX and got a Bronze Star, while I was damn near killed by a mortar on two occasions and another time by a fucking rocket that the officers had the marvelous idea to model with and take pictures in a glass enclosure of the building that everyone was in for protection from that damn rocket round. Seriously, 40 fucking people cramped up in a hallway 10 feet from 6 officers and 2 senior NCOs holding a french UN type 25 rocket warhead.
That whole damn year, not one handshake, pat on the back, or even a "thanks", for climbing up on that roof and damn near getting killed, while all the officers manipulated the story for their award packets. Every vehicle that actually worked, every time the generator cut off in the middle of the night, every fucking time I had to crawl through a humvee that was hit with an IED two days prior and hadn't had the blood washed out of it yet, some still nice and sticky. Yeah, nothing in the lines of recognition, and a shithead with more stripes gets a BS for going shopping all year.
Fuck the goddamn army.
If my ears could talk, they would say, "Thank you, Zorak. You have enriched us both."
This reply was last edited on 03-15-06 10:05:12 PM by Wandering Idiot.
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