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Squareknight
I will never be independant

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(Originally posted on: 01-09-05 12:18:58 AM)
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So my dream for the past 2 years, or at least one of my dreams, was to have a normal chest. You see, I have/had a condition known as Pectus Excavatum, in which my sternum and the front of my ribcage bent inward, so it looked like I was hit with a sledgehammer. Mine was worse in that even though it was pretty shallow, it was quite off centre and I have scoliosis.

Now I went through literal hell to get it "fixed", which I can more or better describe here:

http://www.heavengames.com/cgi-bin/forums/display.cgi?action=st&fn=1&tn=323252&f=1,,0,10&st=0

Please read the above; It will help you understand the 'mood' of this whole post better.

-anyways.
I just took a look from all angles, and I have concluded:

The surgury did jack-shit. hardly a change, heck now I have the sides of the bar sticking out under the skin of my side so I look MORE deformed.


Goddamn.

So guess what, I looked at my chest from all angles, and I have concluded that the surgery did absolutely nothing to fix my problem exept push one of the asymetricaly dented sides out a bit and sorta 25% fix the main concavity. After all I went though, after all the weight I fucking lost (I'm now in the anorexic range I think, I lost so fucking much lying on that bed not eating).

Fuck. It's not sinking in yet, I'm sorta in a daze about it. It's the LAST news I watned to hear. It was my chance to be physically normal, and it was blown.

Not cool.
Baggy_Brad
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Reply 1 of 56 (Originally posted on: 01-09-05 12:26:13 AM)
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Instead of trying to change the way you are you should be embracing it. Be yourself, let the world see you for who you are, which in this case is a skinny, deformed metal guy.
Brad's Summer Journal 4
Smokey
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Reply 2 of 56 (Originally posted on: 01-09-05 12:31:18 AM)
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Jesus christ dude! After all you went through you should look as attractive as...me! Is there any way you can pull that metal bar out of your chest and beat the piss out of the doctor with it? I bet it was cheap either, it's expensive to get tortured and disfigured.

All that HG thread did was reinforce my fear of doctors. Healing hurts more than dying.
If I can bludgeon a hooker to death and burry her in the desert, I sure as shit can punch a little girl and steal her shoes.
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Reply 3 of 56 (Originally posted on: 01-09-05 03:25:28 AM)
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That's some pretty fucked up shit. They certainly would have had to anesthestise you for all of it. Here, you have to get anesthestised even if you're just having a chat.
"I once took a bullet right in the cojones just to prove how tough I am, but the bullet ricocheted off of a pube and shot some kid in the face."
- Maddox http://maddox.xmission.com/
kayte
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Reply 4 of 56 (Originally posted on: 01-09-05 03:40:10 AM)
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You should post pics so we can see if your chest is actually as bad as your perception.

In other news, owie MAGUSMAGUSMAGUSMAGUS
Lyle

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Reply 5 of 56 (Originally posted on: 01-09-05 08:54:09 AM)
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Quoted from kayte:
You should post pics so we can see if your chest is actually as bad as your perception.


Agreed.


Also, that post in HG made me sick to my stomach. I'm terrified of the hospital and having shit like that done to me. I'd much prefer just dying to having anything like that happen.
NNY
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Reply 6 of 56 (Originally posted on: 01-09-05 11:05:05 AM)
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i had a friend in highschool with that. it looked weird, but no one really cared, he showed it off a lot cause it was freaky.
I hate yankees and this is one reason why. Just because you can't pay for 3 hot dogs doesn't mean that the economy is bad and ya'll think that bush is an idiot because he's from Texas. Well f you because he saved your ass from people like Sadam Houssein and don't go thinking i'm just a minupulated trailor trash illiterate for taking up for him because I'm smarter than 90% of the world.

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Frightening social changes continued! And then the religious right began a righteous backlash! First they accused gays and lesbians of being promiscuous! And when this failed, they began accusing them of having long-term committed monogamous relationships and wanting to get married!
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Reply 7 of 56 (Originally posted on: 01-09-05 12:56:20 PM)
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i met a guy like that in missouri over summer vacation and it ended up he lived in texas, but his father lived in steger by me and we chilled once but that was it. the first time i saw him was at a swimming park and he didnt have a shirt on and it didnt really matter but i suppose it did for him.....meh
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Reply 8 of 56 (Originally posted on: 01-09-05 03:21:55 PM)
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Devon, maybe it's not that deformed, it's only that it shows more because you've lost a lot of muscle.

Any possibility of getting surgery again?
Oisin kuollut kuusiöisnä, kaonnut kaheksanöisnä, oisi en paljoa pitänyt: vaaksan palttinapaloa, pikkaraisen pientaretta, emon itkua vähäisen, ison vieläki vähemmän, veikon ei väheäkänä. Aino, sister of Joukahainen. Kalevala, r. IV
drahnier
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Reply 9 of 56 (Originally posted on: 01-09-05 04:50:43 PM)
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Quote:
Any possibility of getting surgery again?

Something tells me that he probably doesn't want to try this again.
DRAHNIER
Pertti Susilainen
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Reply 10 of 56 (Originally posted on: 01-09-05 04:54:01 PM)
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Quoted from Drahnier:
Quote:
Any possibility of getting surgery again?

Something tells me that he probably doesn't want to try this again.

Yeah, that something is his horrid story of pain and suffering. But maybe surgery is what he needs.
Oisin kuollut kuusiöisnä, kaonnut kaheksanöisnä, oisi en paljoa pitänyt: vaaksan palttinapaloa, pikkaraisen pientaretta, emon itkua vähäisen, ison vieläki vähemmän, veikon ei väheäkänä. Aino, sister of Joukahainen. Kalevala, r. IV
Angus

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Reply 11 of 56 (Originally posted on: 01-09-05 05:55:02 PM)
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Could they give him surgery and make sure he doesn't run out of pain killers?
Amphytrite
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I don't really even like hearing about it or reading about it

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Reply 12 of 56 (Originally posted on: 01-09-05 06:15:54 PM)
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Quoted from Angus:
Could they give him surgery and make sure he doesn't run out of pain killers?

That's how you grow dependent on painkillers.
Sorry about your back, Devon MAGUSMAGUSMAGUSMAGUS
Bright side: you can still wiggle your toes!
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Menion
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Reply 13 of 56 (Originally posted on: 01-09-05 09:37:52 PM)
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Well, I hate to be the first one to respond this way, but sometimes you just have to take what you are given in life and make the most of it.

I am truely sorry that you had to endure everything that you did, and I'll be the first to say that I probably wouldn't have made it out with my sanity myself. However, something tells me that after all that, you probably are the way you are supposed to be.
Instead of changing who you are, learn to accept it.

Those that truely love you will do so unconditionally, all you have to do is square up with yourself.

Noone hates you for how you look, and if they do, then you don't need to bother with them anyway because they're self concious shitheads with an inferiority complex.
Ok, that's good to know...

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Smokey
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Reply 14 of 56 (Originally posted on: 01-10-05 05:56:32 AM)
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Shut the fuck up you dumb asshole. It's real easy for someone to just sit back and say "deal with it, retard!" which is exactly what you're saying. But he has every reason to try to fix something that isn't right.

Quote:
all you have to do is square up with yourself.


Well I'm sure he'll just get right on that. Life doesn't boil down to one faux-compassionate philosophy, you douche.
If I can bludgeon a hooker to death and burry her in the desert, I sure as shit can punch a little girl and steal her shoes.
Menion
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Reply 15 of 56 (Originally posted on: 01-10-05 07:06:19 AM)
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Of course he can try, he did and I applaud him for that.

But it didnt work the way he wanted it to. That's unfortunate, but sometimes there really isn't anything you can do about it. When that happens, the best option is to learn to love what you have instead of hating yourself or anyone else.

BTW Devon, there's a good chance you'll develop alot more shape once you build your muscle mass back up again too.
You said they managed to level out the main concavity to some degree, which is good that you can tell considering how much weight you've lost. To be able to see a difference at this point is a very good sign, when you are back up to your normal weight things are going to look even better.
Ok, that's good to know...

"To err is human, but to really foul things up you need a computer." --Paul Ehrlich

"I wish Stanley Baldwin no ill, but it would have been much better if he had never lived" -- Winston Churchill

"I love California, I practically grew up in Phoenix." -- The Infamous Mr. Dan Quayle

This reply was last edited on 01-10-05 07:12:21 AM by Menion.
Smokey
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Reply 16 of 56 (Originally posted on: 01-10-05 08:18:55 AM)
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Quoted from Menion:
Of course he can try, he did and I applaud him for that.

But it didnt work the way he wanted it to. That's unfortunate, but sometimes there really isn't anything you can do about it. When that happens, the best option is to learn to love what you have instead of hating yourself or anyone else.


He didn't need that advice, I don't think anyone here that isn't a friend of Lyle's does. The kind of advice you give to a depressed 3rd grader.

I don't know about the medical stuff but I was going to ask if it's possible that he still needs time to heal. Sometimes massive surgery like that just needs a lot more time to heal than others.

Also am I the only one that really wants to know how this looks?
If I can bludgeon a hooker to death and burry her in the desert, I sure as shit can punch a little girl and steal her shoes.
Squareknight
I will never be independant

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Reply 17 of 56 (Originally posted on: 01-10-05 02:39:11 PM)
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Quote:
BTW Devon, there's a good chance you'll develop alot more shape once you build your muscle mass back up again too.


maybe, but I wont be able to work the muscles near the operation area for about 3 months, so I'll have my work cut out for me.
Salamando
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Reply 18 of 56 (Originally posted on: 01-10-05 09:55:25 PM)
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google image search yeild








LOL!!
cocaine ||||| ||||| ||||| ||||| ||| mushrooms | marijuana ||||| ||||| ||||| ||||| ||||| ||||| ||||| ||||| |||| codeine ||| alcohol ||||| ||||| ||||| ||||| |||| salvia | adderall | HALTED DUE TO PROBATION (will NOT resume in 6 months)
Smokey
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Reply 19 of 56 (Originally posted on: 01-11-05 03:37:22 AM)
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Holy fuck! You have to look better with the rod in it.
If I can bludgeon a hooker to death and burry her in the desert, I sure as shit can punch a little girl and steal her shoes.
Sixten Sparre
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Reply 20 of 56 (Originally posted on: 01-11-05 08:42:05 AM)
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Quote:
Well, I hate to be the first one to respond this way, but sometimes you just have to take what you are given in life and make the most of it.


I completely agree with that statement, and it basicly summed up what i had to say to this.

It's no use to whine, you need to think positive, when you roll in dirt, you get dirty
Tough, Unique, Bad, Bodacious, and Sassy.
Smokey
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Reply 21 of 56 (Originally posted on: 01-11-05 08:47:25 AM)
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The fact that surt backs up that statement makes it all the more shallow and ignorant.

HEY ROLL WITH THE PUNCHES DEVON YOU FUCKING WHINY BITCH! I HAVE A NORMAL CHEST, YOU SEE ME BITCHING?
If I can bludgeon a hooker to death and burry her in the desert, I sure as shit can punch a little girl and steal her shoes.
Sixten Sparre
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Reply 22 of 56 (Originally posted on: 01-11-05 09:40:16 AM)
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and what the fuck do you suggest he should do?
Tough, Unique, Bad, Bodacious, and Sassy.
Salamando
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Reply 23 of 56 (Originally posted on: 01-11-05 12:06:13 PM)
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Quoted from Surt:
and what the fuck do you suggest he should do?
have surgery and get it fixd
cocaine ||||| ||||| ||||| ||||| ||| mushrooms | marijuana ||||| ||||| ||||| ||||| ||||| ||||| ||||| ||||| |||| codeine ||| alcohol ||||| ||||| ||||| ||||| |||| salvia | adderall | HALTED DUE TO PROBATION (will NOT resume in 6 months)
Pertti Susilainen
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Reply 24 of 56 (Originally posted on: 01-11-05 12:39:07 PM)
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Quoted from Salamando:
Quoted from Surt:
and what the fuck do you suggest he should do?
have surgery and get it fixd

In a real hospital this once, if possible.
Oisin kuollut kuusiöisnä, kaonnut kaheksanöisnä, oisi en paljoa pitänyt: vaaksan palttinapaloa, pikkaraisen pientaretta, emon itkua vähäisen, ison vieläki vähemmän, veikon ei väheäkänä. Aino, sister of Joukahainen. Kalevala, r. IV
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