PR
INTL Alumni
oh
 Bassists never get no love, man.
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Posts: 3350 (0.486)
Reg. Date: Mar 2002
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Reply 22 of 42 (Originally posted on: 07-10-04 06:38:11 PM)
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Danielle: *walks into bowling alley looking for date*
Danielle: *notices one long haired stud with painted on tuxedo*
Amon Amuff: *taps foot impatiently and checks his captain planet watch*
Danielle: Ahh, Hi Mike! *enthusiastic wave*
Amon Amuff: *looks up*
Amon Amuff: oh, hi danielle
Amon Amuff: did your car explode or something?
Danielle: *gives you a flower I found outside of the bowling alley*
Amon Amuff: aww
Amon Amuff: thats very sweet
Danielle: Well, no, the bus schedules for this area of town always screw me up, I wasn't even ten minutes late
Amon Amuff: heres a cup i found!
Danielle: I apologize
Amon Amuff: its alright, i understand
Danielle: Thanks, I like drinking things from cups!
Amon Amuff: so...do you like drinking liquids?
Danielle: Yes I am a big fan of liquids, my body is actually largely made up of them.
Danielle: Also I brought a flask of bacardi 151 in my pocket in case you get really boring.
Amon Amuff: oh, can i have that now?
Amon Amuff: *pickpockets danielle*
Amon Amuff: thanks
Danielle: I think you just took my bra off
Danielle: Anyway, we can share it.
Amon Amuff: sharing...? i guess we could do that
Amon Amuff: other than that, why was your bra in your pocket?
Danielle: *looks to see if any managerial figures are around and takes a big swig*
Danielle: oh wouldn't you like to know! *coy*
Danielle: *starts setting up scoreboard for bowling*
Danielle: What do you want your name to be, it has to be four letters
Amon Amuff: USSR
Amon Amuff: i have an unhealthy obsession with zangief
Danielle: Okay... USSR and Dani
Danielle: If you love gay russian furries, you love Zangief.
Amon Amuff: speaking of furries
Amon Amuff: there was an anthrocon in town yesterday
Amon Amuff: it still might be going on
Amon Amuff: a guy in my friends band went
Danielle: He is a furry?
Amon Amuff: apparently
Amon Amuff: it makes me incredibly uncomfortable to think about it
Danielle: Okay, well, anyway, you're up first, champ.
Amon Amuff: *picks a light pink ball*
Danielle: Yes well, a friend of mine is a furry, which makes it harder to make sweeping generalizations.
Amon Amuff: *bowls*
Amon Amuff: i hate bowling.
Danielle: Oh, Hey, I wanted you to know, Amon Amuff, that I don't even mind that you're a fag.
Amon Amuff: hey.
Amon Amuff: im very straight.
Danielle: If you hate bowling why did you suggest it?
Amon Amuff: i didnt suggest it!
Danielle: Prove that you're straight.
Danielle: I would swear that you suggested it!
Amon Amuff: um...breasts, labia, oh yeah!
Danielle: Do you like water slides?
Amon Amuff: im HERE for the waterslides.
Danielle: Alright, well maybe we should just go to the waterslides and forget about the bowling for a bit.
Amon Amuff: oh and your company and stuff
Danielle: You're all charm
Amon Amuff: im like a box of cereal
Danielle: Right.
Danielle: Well I'm going to change into waterslide gear, I'll be back in a moment
Amon Amuff: ok, my painted on tuxedo is still holding up so im good
Danielle: *exits briefly*
Danielle: *returns in bathing suit*
Amon Amuff: hey, thats pretty nice
Amon Amuff: whered you get it?
Danielle: Well most people don't like paisley, but I happen to like them
Amon Amuff: im a huge fan of the seventies
Danielle: Me too. I actually got this bathing suit from a man in his seventies
Amon Amuff: i hope he didnt overcharge you
Danielle: He kept asking for change so I stabbed him. He had this shopping cart full of clothes so I thought, hey cool, a bathing suit.
Amon Amuff: ive heard of some very slick 70-year old con men
Amon Amuff: oh
Danielle: Yeah the price worked well.
Amon Amuff: i thought you meant a legitimate old businessman
Danielle: Is there such a thing?
Amon Amuff: i think so
Danielle: How excellent.
Amon Amuff: im planning on being one when i get out of the time vortex im building
Danielle: Will paisley be popular then?
Amon Amuff: well, if it isnt, thats what my fashion vortex is for.
Amon Amuff: but enough shop talk
Danielle: Well then you're sitting on a gold mine.
Amon Amuff: i try to keep business and waterslides apart
Danielle: Alright, so you're ready to go?
Amon Amuff: yes maam!
Danielle: Careful you don't slip!
Danielle: *skips ahead up the stairs*
Amon Amuff: *starts to climb and stops halfway*
Danielle: *slows when she doesn't hear the padding of feet*
Amon Amuff: i guess now is as good a time as ever to mention that im deathly afraid of ladders and the word "rungs"
Danielle: Muff are you alright?
Amon Amuff: do they happen to have an escalator?
Danielle: Well we're on a stairway
Danielle: Would you rather I piggyback you? *sarcastic*
Amon Amuff: then why is it covered in ladders and "rungs"?
Amon Amuff: *obliviously* could you? that would be great
Danielle: *holds head as though having a horrible headache*
Danielle: Alright, saddle up, chief
Amon Amuff: i have some aspirin in my pocket, if you need it
Amon Amuff: *climbs aboard*
Danielle: Well this is the last time you're mounting anything tonight, I'll tell you that
Danielle: *muscles strain as she climbs*
Amon Amuff: faster!
Danielle: *eye twitches*
Danielle: *climbs faster*
Danielle: Almost... to the .. top
Amon Amuff: *hits you in the legs with a riding crop*
Amon Amuff: weeeeeeeeee!
Danielle: *hand slips on a rung*
Danielle: Ack!
Amon Amuff: AHHHHH!
Danielle: *holds desperately with one hand, legs dangling*
Amon Amuff: RUNGS
Amon Amuff: I TOLD YOU
Amon Amuff: RUNGS
Amon Amuff: ARE
Amon Amuff: NOT
Amon Amuff: GOOD
Danielle: WHAT THE HELL DID YOU DO THAT FOR?
Amon Amuff: there was a tick!
Danielle: There was no tick!
Amon Amuff: then what was that black thing?!
Danielle: Listen buster, there's no way that from on my back you could see something on my leg.
Danielle: *grasps at next handhold and continues climbing*
Amon Amuff: *chuckles aimlessly*
Danielle: *gets to the top and unloads Muff*
Amon Amuff: thanks!
Danielle: *slap*
Amon Amuff: ME FIRST!
Amon Amuff: *jumps down waterslide headfirst*
Danielle: *jumps down the slide before you*
Amon Amuff: OH FUCK NO YOU DIDNT
Danielle: *laughs gleefully*
Amon Amuff: *puts on golf cleats*
Danielle: *splashes in the water while sliding quickly through the plastic tubing
Amon Amuff: *rotates body and stabs you in the back repeatedly*
Danielle: *Cries in pain*
Danielle: OH GOD, OH GOD
Danielle: I'm bleeding all over the place!
Amon Amuff: hahaha this is the best date ive had in years! hahahahaha!
Amon Amuff: YAY!
Amon Amuff: hahahaha!
Danielle: *turns teary eyes to Muff*
Amon Amuff: lets go again!
Danielle: Do you have an erection?
Amon Amuff: *jumps on your back*
Amon Amuff: now i do!
Danielle: I think your penis is penetrating my wounds 
Amon Amuff: hahaha, wounds! youre funny!
Amon Amuff: i feel very comfortable around you
Danielle: *pushes you off my back and races up the stair/ladderway for another go*
Amon Amuff: *stands bleary eyed at the bottom of the ladderstairwayrungfest2k4*
Amon Amuff: so...very...afraid
Danielle: *turns briefly while ascending*
Danielle: *sigh*
Amon Amuff: *yells up* HEY! IS MY WALLET UP THERE?
Danielle: *grabs the sides of the ladder and slides down very smoothly*
Amon Amuff: *continues yelling*
Amon Amuff: HOWD YOU GET DOWN SO FAST?!
Danielle: I'm right here dumbass
Amon Amuff: OH!
Amon Amuff: WAS MY WALLET UP THERE?
Danielle: *yells back sarcastically*
Danielle: I DON'T KNOW
Danielle: WHY DON'T YOU GO CHECK
Amon Amuff: well, you were up there
Amon Amuff: i thought it would be polite.
Danielle: WHY DON'T YOU GRAB EACH RUNG, ONE BY ONE, RUNG AFTER RUNG AND FIND OUT FOR YOURSELF
Amon Amuff: im allergic to grabbing
Amon Amuff: say, mind if i check your wounds?
Danielle: Well if you'd wipe off a bit of the blood on my back
Amon Amuff: maybe my wallet ended up in there.
Danielle: I might be nice enough to climb up there again
Amon Amuff: *starts jabbing the holes*
Danielle: Ow, hey
Amon Amuff: oh, sorry about the burning
Amon Amuff: ive been eating pretzels
Amon Amuff: *continues jabbing*
Danielle: Hmm, if you had a cigarette we could cauterize these wounds.
Danielle: Well I have one *lights up cigarette*
Amon Amuff: sorry, i only smoke pipes
Danielle: Tough cookies
Amon Amuff: *bubbles pour liberously out of my nostrils*
Amon Amuff: the smoothest.
Danielle: Stop touching my back you sicko.
Danielle: Well I'm going for another round on the slide
Danielle: *inhales some smoke*
Amon Amuff: ill be waiting at the locker room. i think im having TOO much fun!
Danielle: Your cumberbund is askew.
Amon Amuff: oh, thats just a scar from the vivisection
Danielle: Oh I see.
Amon Amuff: have fun! come to the lockerroom when youre done
Danielle: How about i take another run, get cleaned up by the onstaff nurse and meet you by the change rooms?
Danielle: Alright.
Amon Amuff: *saunters off in the direction of the womens changing room*
Danielle: *skips up the steps excitedly*
Danielle: -forward a bit-
Danielle: *steps out of the change room*
Danielle: Hey are those my clothes?
Danielle: *in a towel*
Amon Amuff: no, these are uh...hers
Danielle: You just said hers but didn't indicate anyone specifically.
Amon Amuff: *points to nude woman"
Danielle: Oh.
Amon Amuff: the naked one.
Amon Amuff: DUH!!!
Amon Amuff: hey, she has a nice set of hands on her
Amon Amuff: MINE!
Amon Amuff: HAHAHAHA!
Amon Amuff: *gropes strangers*
Danielle: *gets embarassed*
Amon Amuff: whats the matter?
Danielle: *nervously sips rum*
Amon Amuff: so, do you like bowling?
Danielle: It makes me slightly uncomfortable when you grope random people.
Danielle: Well I've only been ten pin bowling once, really.
Amon Amuff: oh, then lets change that!
Amon Amuff: want to go to this great bowling alley i know of?
Amon Amuff: it has a waterslide and everything!
Danielle: Are you sure you're not thinking of a dungeon in the basement for your house?
Danielle: Because you know, fool me once...
Danielle: *walks into bowling alley looking for date*
Danielle: *notices one long haired stud with painted on tuxedo*
Amon Amuff: *taps foot impatiently and checks his captain planet watch*
Danielle: Ahh, Hi Mike! *enthusiastic wave*
Amon Amuff: *looks up*
Amon Amuff: oh, hi danielle
Amon Amuff: did your car explode or something?
Danielle: *gives you a flower I found outside of the bowling alley*
Amon Amuff: aww
Amon Amuff: thats very sweet
Danielle: Well, no, the bus schedules for this area of town always screw me up, I wasn't even ten minutes late
Amon Amuff: heres a cup i found!
Danielle: I apologize
Amon Amuff: its alright, i understand
Danielle: Thanks, I like drinking things from cups!
Amon Amuff: so...do you like drinking liquids?
Danielle: Yes I am a big fan of liquids, my body is actually largely made up of them.
Danielle: Also I brought a flask of bacardi 151 in my pocket in case you get really boring.
Amon Amuff: oh, can i have that now?
Amon Amuff: *pickpockets danielle*
Amon Amuff: thanks
Danielle: I think you just took my bra off
Danielle: Anyway, we can share it.
Amon Amuff: sharing...? i guess we could do that
Amon Amuff: other than that, why was your bra in your pocket?
Danielle: *looks to see if any managerial figures are around and takes a big swig*
Danielle: oh wouldn't you like to know! *coy*
Danielle: *starts setting up scoreboard for bowling*
Danielle: What do you want your name to be, it has to be four letters
Amon Amuff: USSR
Amon Amuff: i have an unhealthy obsession with zangief
Danielle: Okay... USSR and Dani
Danielle: If you love gay russian furries, you love Zangief.
Amon Amuff: speaking of furries
Amon Amuff: there was an anthrocon in town yesterday
Amon Amuff: it still might be going on
Amon Amuff: a guy in my friends band went
Danielle: He is a furry?
Amon Amuff: apparently
Amon Amuff: it makes me incredibly uncomfortable to think about it
Danielle: Okay, well, anyway, you're up first, champ.
Amon Amuff: *picks a light pink ball*
Danielle: Yes well, a friend of mine is a furry, which makes it harder to make sweeping generalizations.
Amon Amuff: *bowls*
Amon Amuff: i hate bowling.
Danielle: Oh, Hey, I wanted you to know, Amon Amuff, that I don't even mind that you're a fag.
Amon Amuff: hey.
Amon Amuff: im very straight.
Danielle: If you hate bowling why did you suggest it?
Amon Amuff: i didnt suggest it!
Danielle: Prove that you're straight.
Danielle: I would swear that you suggested it!
Amon Amuff: um...breasts, labia, oh yeah!
Danielle: Do you like water slides?
Amon Amuff: im HERE for the waterslides.
Danielle: Alright, well maybe we should just go to the waterslides and forget about the bowling for a bit.
Amon Amuff: oh and your company and stuff
Danielle: You're all charm
Amon Amuff: im like a box of cereal
Danielle: Right.
Danielle: Well I'm going to change into waterslide gear, I'll be back in a moment
Amon Amuff: ok, my painted on tuxedo is still holding up so im good
Danielle: *exits briefly*
Danielle: *returns in bathing suit*
Amon Amuff: hey, thats pretty nice
Amon Amuff: whered you get it?
Danielle: Well most people don't like paisley, but I happen to like them
Amon Amuff: im a huge fan of the seventies
Danielle: Me too. I actually got this bathing suit from a man in his seventies
Amon Amuff: i hope he didnt overcharge you
Danielle: He kept asking for change so I stabbed him. He had this shopping cart full of clothes so I thought, hey cool, a bathing suit.
Amon Amuff: ive heard of some very slick 70-year old con men
Amon Amuff: oh
Danielle: Yeah the price worked well.
Amon Amuff: i thought you meant a legitimate old businessman
Danielle: Is there such a thing?
Amon Amuff: i think so
Danielle: How excellent.
Amon Amuff: im planning on being one when i get out of the time vortex im building
Danielle: Will paisley be popular then?
Amon Amuff: well, if it isnt, thats what my fashion vortex is for.
Amon Amuff: but enough shop talk
Danielle: Well then you're sitting on a gold mine.
Amon Amuff: i try to keep business and waterslides apart
Danielle: Alright, so you're ready to go?
Amon Amuff: yes maam!
Danielle: Careful you don't slip!
Danielle: *skips ahead up the stairs*
Amon Amuff: *starts to climb and stops halfway*
Danielle: *slows when she doesn't hear the padding of feet*
Amon Amuff: i guess now is as good a time as ever to mention that im deathly afraid of ladders and the word "rungs"
Danielle: Muff are you alright?
Amon Amuff: do they happen to have an escalator?
Danielle: Well we're on a stairway
Danielle: Would you rather I piggyback you? *sarcastic*
Amon Amuff: then why is it covered in ladders and "rungs"?
Amon Amuff: *obliviously* could you? that would be great
Danielle: *holds head as though having a horrible headache*
Danielle: Alright, saddle up, chief
Amon Amuff: i have some aspirin in my pocket, if you need it
Amon Amuff: *climbs aboard*
Danielle: Well this is the last time you're mounting anything tonight, I'll tell you that
Danielle: *muscles strain as she climbs*
Amon Amuff: faster!
Danielle: *eye twitches*
Danielle: *climbs faster*
Danielle: Almost... to the .. top
Amon Amuff: *hits you in the legs with a riding crop*
Amon Amuff: weeeeeeeeee!
Danielle: *hand slips on a rung*
Danielle: Ack!
Amon Amuff: AHHHHH!
Danielle: *holds desperately with one hand, legs dangling*
Amon Amuff: RUNGS
Amon Amuff: I TOLD YOU
Amon Amuff: RUNGS
Amon Amuff: ARE
Amon Amuff: NOT
Amon Amuff: GOOD
Danielle: WHAT THE HELL DID YOU DO THAT FOR?
Amon Amuff: there was a tick!
Danielle: There was no tick!
Amon Amuff: then what was that black thing?!
Danielle: Listen buster, there's no way that from on my back you could see something on my leg.
Danielle: *grasps at next handhold and continues climbing*
Amon Amuff: *chuckles aimlessly*
Danielle: *gets to the top and unloads Muff*
Amon Amuff: thanks!
Danielle: *slap*
Amon Amuff: ME FIRST!
Amon Amuff: *jumps down waterslide headfirst*
Danielle: *jumps down the slide before you*
Amon Amuff: OH FUCK NO YOU DIDNT
Danielle: *laughs gleefully*
Amon Amuff: *puts on golf cleats*
Danielle: *splashes in the water while sliding quickly through the plastic tubing
Amon Amuff: *rotates body and stabs you in the back repeatedly*
Danielle: *Cries in pain*
Danielle: OH GOD, OH GOD
Danielle: I'm bleeding all over the place!
Amon Amuff: hahaha this is the best date ive had in years! hahahahaha!
Amon Amuff: YAY!
Amon Amuff: hahahaha!
Danielle: *turns teary eyes to Muff*
Amon Amuff: lets go again!
Danielle: Do you have an erection?
Amon Amuff: *jumps on your back*
Amon Amuff: now i do!
Danielle: I think your penis is penetrating my wounds 
Amon Amuff: hahaha, wounds! youre funny!
Amon Amuff: i feel very comfortable around you
Danielle: *pushes you off my back and races up the stair/ladderway for another go*
Amon Amuff: *stands bleary eyed at the bottom of the ladderstairwayrungfest2k4*
Amon Amuff: so...very...afraid
Danielle: *turns briefly while ascending*
Danielle: *sigh*
Amon Amuff: *yells up* HEY! IS MY WALLET UP THERE?
Danielle: *grabs the sides of the ladder and slides down very smoothly*
Amon Amuff: *continues yelling*
Amon Amuff: HOWD YOU GET DOWN SO FAST?!
Danielle: I'm right here dumbass
Amon Amuff: OH!
Amon Amuff: WAS MY WALLET UP THERE?
Danielle: *yells back sarcastically*
Danielle: I DON'T KNOW
Danielle: WHY DON'T YOU GO CHECK
Amon Amuff: well, you were up there
Amon Amuff: i thought it would be polite.
Danielle: WHY DON'T YOU GRAB EACH RUNG, ONE BY ONE, RUNG AFTER RUNG AND FIND OUT FOR YOURSELF
Amon Amuff: im allergic to grabbing
Amon Amuff: say, mind if i check your wounds?
Danielle: Well if you'd wipe off a bit of the blood on my back
Amon Amuff: maybe my wallet ended up in there.
Danielle: I might be nice enough to climb up there again
Amon Amuff: *starts jabbing the holes*
Danielle: Ow, hey
Amon Amuff: oh, sorry about the burning
Amon Amuff: ive been eating pretzels
Amon Amuff: *continues jabbing*
Danielle: Hmm, if you had a cigarette we could cauterize these wounds.
Danielle: Well I have one *lights up cigarette*
Amon Amuff: sorry, i only smoke pipes
Danielle: Tough cookies
Amon Amuff: *bubbles pour liberously out of my nostrils*
Amon Amuff: the smoothest.
Danielle: Stop touching my back you sicko.
Danielle: Well I'm going for another round on the slide
Danielle: *inhales some smoke*
Amon Amuff: ill be waiting at the locker room. i think im having TOO much fun!
Danielle: Your cumberbund is askew.
Amon Amuff: oh, thats just a scar from the vivisection
Danielle: Oh I see.
Amon Amuff: have fun! come to the lockerroom when youre done
Danielle: How about i take another run, get cleaned up by the onstaff nurse and meet you by the change rooms?
Danielle: Alright.
Amon Amuff: *saunters off in the direction of the womens changing room*
Danielle: *skips up the steps excitedly*
Danielle: -forward a bit-
Danielle: *steps out of the change room*
Danielle: Hey are those my clothes?
Danielle: *in a towel*
Amon Amuff: no, these are uh...hers
Danielle: You just said hers but didn't indicate anyone specifically.
Amon Amuff: *points to nude woman"
Danielle: Oh.
Amon Amuff: the naked one.
Amon Amuff: DUH!!!
Amon Amuff: hey, she has a nice set of hands on her
Amon Amuff: MINE!
Amon Amuff: HAHAHAHA!
Amon Amuff: *gropes strangers*
Danielle: *gets embarassed*
Amon Amuff: whats the matter?
Danielle: *nervously sips rum*
Amon Amuff: so, do you like bowling?
Danielle: It makes me slightly uncomfortable when you grope random people.
Danielle: Well I've only been ten pin bowling once, really.
Amon Amuff: oh, then lets change that!
Amon Amuff: want to go to this great bowling alley i know of?
Amon Amuff: it has a waterslide and everything!
Danielle: Are you sure you're not thinking of a dungeon in the basement for your house?
Danielle: Because you know, fool me once...
Amon Amuff: no, its not a dungeon this time, i promise
Danielle: Well alright
Danielle: One minute though please
Amon Amuff: ok, take your time
Danielle: *is still in a towel*
Danielle: *awkwardly slips into skirt and pulls a tank top over her head*
Danielle: *throws towel away*
Danielle: You never know with the diseases these days
Danielle: So do you have a car here?
Amon Amuff: yeah, there are diseases all over the place. im a biochemist.
Amon Amuff: of course i have a car
Amon Amuff: didnt i just say i was a biochemist?
Amon Amuff: lets roll!
Danielle: *hops through passenger window into car*
Amon Amuff: *peels out while youre still only half in*
Danielle: *window shards seep into my skin*
Danielle: haha, I'm in quite a bit of pain!
Amon Amuff: wooooooooo!
Danielle: *slips into window and fastens seatbelt*
Amon Amuff: *turns on radio, blasts jazz renditions of metallica*
Amon Amuff: EYEEEEEEEHAHAHAHAAYYYYYYYYAY!
Danielle: *gives self insulin injection*
Amon Amuff: SO WHAT KIND OF MUSIC DO YOU LIKE?
Danielle: OH I'M INTO ALMOST ANYTHING
Danielle: MOST OFTEN DEATH METAL, YOU KNOW HOW IT IS.
Amon Amuff: YEAH
Amon Amuff: DO YOU LIKE DECAPITATED PIG ROCK MENSTRUAL BEANS?
Danielle: THOUGH FOR MY MONEY, NO ONE REALLY COMMUNICATES HURT LIKE AVRIL LAVIGNE, IT'S LIKE SHE HAS A USB CONNECTION TO MY HEART
Amon Amuff: OH, DO YOU LIKE COMPUTERS?
Danielle: WELL THOUGH I FIND THEM TRITE I DO LIKE THEIR HARDCORE RIFS AND HOW THEY CALL WOMEN BITCHES AND WHORES ALL THE TIME
Danielle: I AM A COMPUTER
Amon Amuff: THATS CRAZY!
Danielle: WELL, YEAH
Danielle: ALL WORKING PARTS, I MEAN I'M MADE FROM A HUMAN BEING, JUST ... Y'KNOW, SUPERIOR
Amon Amuff: HOW ARE YOU OPERATING WITHOUT A BATTERY OR A GENERATOR OR A BUNCH OF SOLAR PANELS OR COAL ENGINES?
Danielle: *shrugs and looks out window*
Danielle: OH I HAVE A BATTERY
Amon Amuff: WHAT SIZE?
Danielle: TWO AAA'S
Danielle: I'M VERY ENERGY EFFICIENT
Amon Amuff: WOW, I THOGHT THEY LOOKED BIGGER
Danielle: I DON'T GET IT.
Danielle: DID YOU JUST GO THROUGH THAT RED LIGHT?
Amon Amuff: YEAH, BUT ITS AFTER 6
Amon Amuff: IT DOESNT COUNT AFTER 6
Danielle: O OKAY
Amon Amuff: *sirens wail*
Amon Amuff: SEE?
Amon Amuff: THOSE SIRENS MEAN IM RIGHT
Amon Amuff: SO DO THE FLASHING LIGHTS
Danielle: YES THIS ALL MAKES SENSE
Amon Amuff: MAYBE I WON A PRIZE FOR RUNNING THE RED LIGHT
Amon Amuff: IF IT IS A SOFT PRIZE YOU CAN HAVE IT
Danielle: HOW KIND
Danielle: I BELIEVE THEY'D LIKE YOU TO PULL OVER
Amon Amuff: OH, DO YOU THINK THEYRE LOST?
Danielle: *lights up marijuana pipe*
Danielle: EITHER THAT OR PERHAPS THEY JUST WANT TO GET BY YOU
Amon Amuff: *pulls over and starts pounding shots of rum*
Danielle: CHILL OUT.
Danielle: *turns music down*
Amon Amuff: hello officer
Amon Amuff: well, yeah i did go through the light
Danielle: *waves through the window*
Amon Amuff: but its after 6
Amon Amuff: yeah thats my date
Danielle: *pulls skirt down subconsciously*
Amon Amuff: no, you cant search her "crevice" for "sex"
Amon Amuff: sex isnt even a drug
Danielle: WHAT IS HE SAYING?
Amon Amuff: wait, arent officers supposed to wear uniforms?
Amon Amuff: yeah, fuck you buddy
Amon Amuff: *speeds off*
Amon Amuff: *turns music back up*
Danielle: *inhales pipe*
Amon Amuff: LIKE THE NAVY HAS ANY JURISDICTION HERE
Danielle: *starts coughing uncontrolably*
Amon Amuff: ITS NOT LIKE WERE DRIVING THROUGH A RIVER
Amon Amuff: *crash*
Amon Amuff: WELL NOW WE ARE BUT STILL
Danielle: *face turns red*
Amon Amuff: THERE ARENT ANY LIGHTS HERE
Amon Amuff: *runs red light*
Amon Amuff: ...
Amon Amuff: WELL THERE ARENT ANY STOP SIGNS
Amon Amuff: *runs stop sign*
Danielle: *starts poking you for attention*
Amon Amuff: WHO BUILT THIS CITY?!
Danielle: *awkwardly wheezing up pot smoke*
Amon Amuff: WELL WERE KIND OF SINKING NOW
Amon Amuff: WANT TO MAKE OUT?
Danielle: *eyes are bloodshot*
Danielle: *nods frantically*
Amon Amuff: *puckers up and leans in*
Amon Amuff: *stops short and shoves your face away with an open hand*
Amon Amuff: HOLD ON I LOVE THIS PART!
Danielle: *coughs out pipe awkwardly*
Amon Amuff: DUN DUN DUN DUN DUN DUN DUNNNN WEEEEEEEEER DUN DUN DUN DUN DUN
Amon Amuff: DUN DUN DUN
Amon Amuff: WEEEEEEEER
Amon Amuff: DUN DUN DUND UDUNDUNDUNDUNDUNDUNDUDNUND
Danielle: *coughs and wheezes for a few minutes*
Amon Amuff: *headbangs frantically, striking the steering wheel with my face repeatedly
Amon Amuff: *DUN DUN DUND UND UNDUNDUND*
Amon Amuff: *airbag deploys*
Amon Amuff: WOW
Amon Amuff: WAS IT AS GOOD FOR YOU AS IT WAS FOR ME?!
Danielle: *wipes eyes*
Danielle: Sweetie you're bleeding
Danielle: *wipes blood from your face*
Amon Amuff: DONT WORRY ILL WASH IT OFF
Amon Amuff: *climbs out of car into the river*
Amon Amuff: thats the ticket
Danielle: I just peed
Amon Amuff: *gets carried away by the current*
Amon Amuff: HEY!
Danielle: OH FOR FUCKS SAKE
Amon Amuff: HEY, I DONT THINK I CAN STOP
Amon Amuff: UM
Amon Amuff: UM
Amon Amuff: I HAD A GOOD TIME!
Amon Amuff: *sinks briefly*
Danielle: I DID TOO
Amon Amuff: *cough* I HOPE! *sputter* WE CAN SEE EACH OTHER *cough*
Danielle: I THOUGHT MAYBE WE'D HAVE SEX AND NEVER TALK AGAIN, BUT NOT HAVING SEX AND NOT TALKING AGAIN IS ALRIGHT TOO
Amon Amuff: AGAIN SOMETIME
Amon Amuff: *sinks*
Danielle: YOU HAVE PRETTY HAIR
Amon Amuff: *bubbles appear, then subside*
Danielle: *closes door and starts car*
Danielle: fucking standard
Danielle: *drives away with some trouble*
Champagne for my real friends; real pain for my sham friends.
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